Fathwa, - New to the faith: torn between faith and the husband of45 years who is not willing to convert…

Question:
I have a sister in Islam she is a convert like I am only she is much
older, has been a convert for 4 years and has no Muslim community in
her area. She is in the USA but her area is small. She is 67 years
old, has been married 45 years and loves her husband so much. She
found Islam online 4 years ago after being Christian all her life. She
is not having much help trying to find answers to some very hard
questions. She has not been intimate with her husband since she
converted due to worry that she will be in sin. She loves him and has
talked to him about Islam but he is not wanting to convert. She feels
so bad and does not want to leave him after all these years as he has
been very good to her. She loves him so much and I feel sad for her.
He is not trying to get her to change her mind just misses her love.
Answer:
Assalamu alaykum
In the name of Allah the Inspirer of truth.
It would be most useful at this point for this sister to study the
faith more deeply. Once the love for Allah and His Messenger envelopes
her heart, she will find it easy to surmount any difficulty in
pleasing Allah. Many have gone through much worse for the preservation
of their faith.
It is not permissible for her to be intimate with her husband, since
there is a barrier of a difference of faith between them. Once Islam
has been presented to him and he has not accepted then she becomes
separated from him after three menstruation cycles or three months if
she is post menopausal (Radd al-Muhtar). Hence, she has ceased to be
his wife and as such any sexual intercourse will now come into the
realm of fornication.
Continuing intimacy constitutes a grave sin from which she has to
repent to Allah. As long as she does not consider it lawful then it
will not constitute disbelief. Leaving him, despite being necessary in
this case, will hopefully have many added benefits: for instance, her
prayers will intensify for him to be guided, and he may realize the
value of her faith and show him the true light.
May Allah grant her husband the light of faith, and grant her the
strength to be patient for the remaining years of her life for the
eternal bliss of the Hereafter.
And Allah is with those who have broken hearts.
Wassalam