Nadia came home from school holding up a bound book proudly."Look what
I made," she said to her mother excitedly, waving her book back and
forth. Her mother glimpsed the title,My Best Memory.
As her mom flipped through it, she realized itwas about Ramadhan.
Pictures of masajid, people offering salah, and families breaking
their fast filled the pages.Nadia chattered excitedlyshowing her mom
the pictures and reading the words. "I told my class all about it,"
she said happily, adding, "They thought it was so cool."
"Ramadhan was months ago," said her mom, surprised. But as she looked
at her daughter's shining face, reliving her memories, she realized
that the spirit of Ramadhan was not forgotten by her 7-year old
daughter.
Every year, as Ramadhan approaches, families startgetting ready. They
stockup on food, make sure they have enough dates, and fast a couple
of days to "warm up." Everythingfrom these early preparations to the
very last rak'ah of Taraweeh isembedded in a child's mind. The spirit
of Ramadhan is so strong, that months and years later, children still
remember it, just as Nadia did.
And it is with the parent that the responsibility to make this month
memorable lies. It is up to you to make sure that you have made this
month special enough for your kids that they will always remember the
feel of Ramadhan. And it is also up to you tomake sure that they
understand what it is all about.
Ramadhan is about spirituality. It is about salah and fasting and
sacrifice and discipline. But to a child, it is also a month full of
happiness.
Ways to make Ramadan special
There are so many ways to make your child feel that Ramadhan is a
special month. Each family has its own traditions, and will have
specific ideas about how to spend the month. Some may wake up and have
an actual meal at suhoor. Others may read the Qur'an together every
morning. Some may attend Taraweeh salah every night. But here are some
general things that are sure to last with your children for their
entire life.
Taraweeh
Taking your children to the masjid is always important. But in
Ramadhan, the effect is twice as significant. When children see such
alarge number of Muslims surrounding them, all there for the same
purpose, they will sense that feeling of unity. It helps them
understand the concept of brotherhood and sisterhood. It is a time
forthem to learn to worship Allah, and it can also be atime for them
to have fun with other Muslim children. Parents can make deals with
their children, such as having them make a few rak'ahs, and then
letting them play or join the youth group activities. Obviously, this
has a stronger effect in bigger communities, but even the smaller ones
can make it work. And while this may be late at night, letting your
children stay up past their bed time a few times a week during this
month will not do much harm. Breaking therules once in a while
mayactually pay off.
Gatherings
As I mentioned earlier, Ramadhan is a time of unit. When you break
your fast together, it helps to affirm this feeling in children's
minds. Some nights can be just family gatherings,while others can
involve friends, or even the community as a whole. Inviting others to
your home to break fast not only brings you reward, but also creates
wonderful memories. Many masajid also hold community iftars a few
times a week. It is alwaysnice to show your children that we are one
Ummah, and these gatherings help them understand what it means.
Encourage fasting
Even young children can be encouraged to fast. Sometimes they can fast
on weekends, or fast halfof the day. However you decide to do it, it
helps children feel invoked, and strengthens their understanding of
what this month is all about. And as they fast, explain to them why
they are doing so. Let them know that you are happy with them, and
more importantly, that Allah is happy with them as well.
Ramadhan provides you the opportunity to teach your children about an
array of different topics. You can use the time right after iftar to
have a short lesson. Explain why we fast, read ayahs from the Qur'an
about Ramadhan, or tell them a little bit about the seerahof the
Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wa sallam. Teach them the importance of
self-discipline, and hat the meaning of an Ummah is. Show them the
countless blessings ofAllah upon us, and what it means to be thankful.
If you have a big community that offers a children's program during
Ramadhan, let them attend it. These lessons will also stay withthem
for life, Inshallah.
You can also go to your child's school, and tell his/her class about
Ramadhan. This will break the ice for your child, and may well makeit
easier for him/her to fast during the schooldays. It is an opportunity
to show your children that they can share their religious events and
holidays with others.
Muslim children need to feel the significance of Ramadhan, and
understand that we haveevents that are just as exciting as the
non-Muslim events they constantly hear about. In a time when Christmas
and Halloween and Easter are surrounded with such a fuss, it is
imperative that we show our children that they are not left out of
festivities. Islam gives them their own special events, which have
meaning as well as provide wonderful memories.
What I listed above are just a few things that willenhance the memory
of Ramadhan in a child's mind. Each family will follow old traditions
and create new ones as the years go on. It is not so much the
specifics as it is the overall atmosphere of the month. However, with
children, this atmosphere needs to be created early on, so that it can
be felt in their lateryears.
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