As salamaulaykum,
I am going through a difficult time in my life. Allah is testing me,
and I am patiently waiting for my du'as to be answered. At times of
purity, I am atpeace because I can come to Allah. But during my
menstrual cycle, I am reduced to a state of drepression, self-pity,
tears... I don'tknow how to soothe myself. I can't pray, I can't read
the Qur'an, I can't enter a masjid.
It's a week of hell. What can I do to end my grief? It comes back
every month, andI can't deal with these feelings.
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful.
Dear Sister,
I pray this message finds you in good health and spirits.
First off, if you are suffering from serious depression during your
menstrual cycle, it may be advisable to see an OB-GYN. Some women
experience mood swingsright before and during their menstrual cycles.
However, serious depression is not typical and should not be
overlooked.
The beauty of our way oflife is that the believer is never cut off
from her Lord, no matter what herstate. Even if a woman is
menstruating or experiencing postnatal bleeding, there are still ways
for her to strengthen her iman anddraw nearer to Allah Most High.
While you are menstruating, there are specific acts of worship, which
are prohibited. The reason for the prohibition is the lack of ritual
purity, and not a deficiency in you. There is no reason to be
depressed. It is not a punishment that you can't pray. Rather, it is a
mercy from Allah Most High that He has lifted these obligations from
women experiencing menstrual or postnatal bleeding, while at the same
time not taking anything away from them in terms of reward or good
deeds.
According to the Hanafi School, the acts of worship which you cannnot
do during your period (or postnatal bleeding) are as follows:
1. Prayer, whether obligatory or voluntary
2. Fasting, whether obligatory or voluntary
3. Sexual intercourse, although it is permitted for the husband and
wife to kiss, cuddle, and lay together, as long as the husband avoids
direct contact with the area between her navel and knee
4. Making tawaf (circumambulation of the Kaaba)
5. Entering a masjid
6. Touching the Qur'an
7. Reciting the Qur'an with the intention of recitation
These are the things you can't do. However, there are things you can
do to keep your connection to Allah Most High:
1. Listen to the Qur'an. Either have someone recite it to you, or
listen to a tape or cd.
2. The Hanafi School recommends that menstruating women make ablution
at the time of prayer, sit in a quiet place, and supplicate Allah.
Although the ablution does not lift the state of ritual impurity, it
still puts one in a good frameof mind.
3. Constant remembranceof Allah. Remember that the Prophet, Allah
bless him and give him peace, remembered Allah in all his states.
There is nothing preventing you from supplicating Allah and making
remembrance of Him ( dhikr ). Furthermore, even if the supplications
contain verses from the Qur'an, as many do, it is permitted to say
these supplications, provided that you do so with the intention of
remembrance, and not recitation.
4. Study Sacred Knowledge. It is permissible to handle books of tafsir
(Qur'an commentary), fiqh (Sacred Law), and hadith, provided that they
do not contain more Qur'anic text than commentary.
5. Listen to uplifting tapes and cds. There are many nice productions
to listen to, for example, Shaykh Hamza Yusuf's Purification of the
Heart. Since you're not praying,why not take the extra time to listen
to some of these?
6. Get a sisters' gatheringtogether. Even if you're not praying,
chances are someone else is. Have this sister recite Qur'an for you.
Being in good company lifts one's spirits.
7. Join a class here at SunniPath. Since the courses are available
online, you can log on at your convenience and listen to
traditionally-trained scholars. I can personally vouch for the quality
of these courses. Furthermore, when I felt bad, nothing strengthened
my iman and uplifted my spirits more than going to SunniPath and
benefiting from the blessed knowledge offered in a wide array of
courses.
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