have three children; I come from a Christian family that is tolerant
of my being Muslim. My question is: how can I introduce Islam to my
children, one of whom iseleven years old, the other is eight years
old, and my daughter is five years old, without forcing them?
Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
We praise Allah for having enabled you to enter Islam and we ask Him,
may He be exalted, to make you steadfast and to guide your familyto
this religion.
We are advise you not tobe careless or lazy about guiding and teaching
them, in the way that is best, in the hope that Allah will grant you
the joy of seeing them enter Islam, and decree for you a reward equal
to the reward for their good deeds.
Secondly:
You have done well to ask about your children and how to raise them in
Islam. Allah, may He beexalted, has placed a great deal of
responsibility on parents' shoulders for the upbringing of their
children.
It was narrated that 'Abdullah ibn 'Umar (mayAllah be pleased with
him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of
Allah be upon him) say: "Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is
responsible for hisflock. The ruler is a shepherd and is responsible
for his flock. A man is the shepherd ofhis household and is
responsible for his flock. A woman is the shepherd of her husband's
house"
Narrated by al-Bukhaari,853; Muslim, 1829
Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
Whoever neglects to teach his son that which will benefit him, and
ignores him, has done something very bad indeed. Most children
goastray because of their parents who neglect them and fail to teach
them the duties and Sunnahs of their religion. They neglect them when
they are young so they do not benefit themselves or benefit their
parents when they grow up. End quote. End quote from Tuhfat
al-Ahwadhi, p. 229
Thirdly:
What we advise you to do with regard to introducing Islam to your
children making it appealing to them include the following:
1. Create a connection between them and the Arabic language, and
instil a love for it in theirhearts, because it is an important key to
understanding and loving Islam.
2. Help them get to know friends of their own age and background
who are practising Muslims. It is essential that these friends should
be of good character and righteous, so that they can influence your
children and be an example for them in their righteousness and
adherence to Islam, and the manner in which they interact with their
parents.
The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him)
said: "The likeness of a good companion and a bad companion is that of
onewho carries musk and one who works the bellows. With the carrierof
musk, either he will give you some or you will buy some from him, or
you will notice a goodsmell from him; as for the one who works the
bellows, either he will burn your clothes or youwill notice a bad
smell from him."
Narrated by al-Bukhaari,1995; Muslim, 2628
3. Make them feel an attachment to the mosque, by encouragingthem
to pray and attend classes; you can also make that attractive to them
and encourage them by giving them gifts and prizes every time one of
them shows some progress in his or her classes.
It is also a good idea for you to go with them to the mosque, to
encourage them to go there and pray.
If it is not easy for them to go to the mosque because it is far away
or the route is not safe, then do not neglect to teach them to pray on
time at home. There is a binding instruction (from the Prophet
(blessings and peace of Allah be upon him)) to teach those who reach
the age of seven to pray and to make them do it; before this age they
maybe taught but not by way of making them do it.
The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him)
said: "Instruct your children to pray when they are seven years old
and smack them if they do not do it when they are ten, and separate
them in their beds."
Narrated by Abu Dawood, 495; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh
Abi Dawood
4. Let them hear Qur'an recited in beautiful voices, so that the
Qur'an will be held in high esteem in their hearts. The Book of
Allahis a Book of guidance and light for people, which will illuminate
theway for them and make them steadfast in adhering to the straight
path, by Allah's leave.
5. Watch Islamic cartoons and movies so that they can compare what
they see and hear in them with what they see and hear in other movies.
Here you have an important role to playin explaining the differences
between the two, and highlight how Islam encourages peopleto do good,
uphold ties of kinship, show kindness and be merciful, and it forbids
evil, severing ties of kinship, corruption and hardheartedness.
6. Show them Islamic websites that will be beneficial for them,
eachaccording to his age andwhilst being careful not to let them roam
freely on the internet; rather that should be through you.
7. Something that you should think about seriously and that will
help you in what you areseeking to achieve is taking them to do 'Umrah
and visit the sacred House of Allah, for these visits have a
far-reaching impact on the hearts of young people as is also the
casewith adults.
8. Teach them the basic principles of belief in a simple and
straightforward manner according to their ages, such as the Oneness of
Allah, may He be exalted,and that He can hear them and see them, and
that He rewards for good deeds and adhering to the rulings of Islam
The fact that 'Abdullah ibn 'Abbaas was very young did not prevent the
Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) from saying to him
eloquent words about Tawheed and 'aqeedah (belief). It was narrated
that Ibn 'Abbaas said: I was behind the Messenger ofAllah (blessings
and peace of Allah be upon him) one day and he said: "O young man, I
shall teach you some words (of advice): be mindful of Allah, and Allah
will protect you. Bemindful of Allah, and youwill find Him in front of
you. If you ask, ask of Allah; if you seek help, seek help of Allah.
Know that if the nation were to gather together to benefit you with
anything, it would benefit you only with something that Allah
hadalready decreed for you, and that if they were to gather together
to harm you with anything, they would only harm you with something
Allah had already decreed for you. The pens have beenlifted and the
pages have dried."
Narrated by at-Tirmidhi, 2516; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in
Saheeh at-Tirmidhi.
See also the answer to question no. 22175
9. Present stories appropriate to their ages from the biographyof
the Prophet Muhammad (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) and
his noble Companions (may Allah be pleased with them), so that they
will know that they belong to the best religion, the best Prophet, the
best nation.
|See the answer to questions no. 21215 and 22496
10. Put them in Islamic schools and keep them away from corrupt
schools, so that the Islamic schools can take care of their beliefs
and conduct; choose the bestof them according to what you see fit.
See the answer to question no. 38284
You should not be careless about two important matters:
-1-
Pray that Allah help themand guide them; your supplication will be an
important means of their being guided, so do not neglect it and do not
think little of it.
-2-
You should be a good example for them in treating them kindly
andshowing compassion towards them. That is not only part of
motherhood; it is also part of being a Muslim who adheres to the
religion of Allah, may He be exalted.
We ask Allah to help you to do that which is good and to guide your
children to that which He loves and which pleases Him.
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