Based on the advices of Shaykh Muhammad Saleem Dhorat
prepared by Brother Aslam Patel
"You have never seen anything better than marriage for those who
love." (Ibne Mãjah)
Shaykh Muhammad Saleem Dhorat dãmat barakãtuhum advises:
1 . Every action is dependant upon intention. When marrying, both
partners should therefore make a firm intention to accomplish the
following objectives:
*. Following the Sunnah of our beloved Nabee Muhammad s.
*. Safeguarding oneself from sins.
*. Parenting pious children.
2 . When marrying, each becomes the other's lifetime companion. Each
should understand and appreciate that Allah S has brought them both
together and that their destiny in life has now become one. Whatever
thecircumstances: happiness or sorrow; health or sickness; wealth or
poverty; comfort or hardship; trial or ease; all events are to be
confronted together as a team with mutual affectionand respect. No
matter how wealthy, affluent, materially prosperous and "better-off"
another couplemay appear, one's circumstances are to be happily
accepted with qanã'at ( contentment uponthe Choice of Allah S). The
wife should happily accept her husband, his home andincome as her lot
and should always feel that herhusband is her true beloved and best
friend and well-wisher in all family decisions. The husband too should
accept his wife as his partner-for-life and not cast a glance towards
another.
3 . Nowadays, the husband reads about, and is well-informed of his
rights and demands them. Similarly, the wife reads of her rights and
expects them. However, both should concentrate on being aware of each
other's rights and then strive to fulfil them. This is the
prescription for a prosperous marriage and everlasting love.
4 . During the first year of marriage, the couple must try and spend
as much time as possible together. This is especially true for the
first two months as it provides an opportunity tounderstand each
other's temperaments and establishes a firm foundation which
contributes towards securing a prosperous marriage.
5 . The couple (especially the husband) must make a point to arrive
home early after 'Ishã Salãh and scrupulously avoid the habit of
socialising with friends late into the evening. Wherever possible,
business, employment and other activities should be concluded
beforehand or curtailed in order to set aside time for spending
together.
6 . Mutual respect between husband and wife should not be lost. They
should each be very particular about following the Deen right from the
initial stagesof married life. This will also ensure a religious
environment for the children to be nurtured in, contributing greatly
towards their successful upbringing.
7 . True and everlasting prosperity is only possible for Muslims when
they follow the Sunnah of Rasoolullah s in all affairs. The couple
too, should adhere to the teachings of Rasoolullah s in all their
matters and abstain from anything which contradictsthem. Careful
attention should be given to this in their intimate relationship too.
Inshã'allah this will be an assured approach to acquiring the blessing
of pious offspring.
8 . In the initial stages of marriage, the love between the couple is
a physical bond, wherein emotional changes take place all the time.
Despite great passion and physical love for each other, affection
between the couple is not yet well established or on a rationalbasis.
Such rational love comes after many years together. It is therefore
extremely important for the husband not to succumb to emotional
weaknesses at the onset and let the marriage wavertowards an
irreligious direction. Both the husband and wife should make a pledge
to each other to steadfastly follow the Deen, especially in the
performance of Salãh and in avoiding all sins.
9 . Marriage is like the weather, forever changing. Sometimes it is
cloudy and rainy, life appears gloomy, then the sun appears and rays
of happiness break through bringing joy. At times, one experiences
rain, wind and sunshine all in one day. Such is life, and like the
seasons, we go through different experiences. The secret is to remain
devoted and steadfast to one's Deen and spouse.
10 . The husband should besympathetic to the fact that his wife has
left her parents, brothers and sisters to start a new life with him.
Her sacrifice and her feelings should be respected and joy should be
felt by both partners at the expansion of their families.
Just as the wife should treat her husband's parentsas her own, he
should also extend affection, courtesy and respect to his new in-laws.
--
- - -
Translate:
http://translate.google.com/m?hl=en&twu=1/
- - - -
No comments:
Post a Comment