Friday, January 5, 2018

How 2 manage yourself, - 5 Types of people who will always put you down, -

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Do you feel hurt?
You have been criticized badly? or Humiliated by someone?
The good news i have for you is that this person might be mentally unstable!
First of all there is a great difference between constructive criticism that comes from family members or close friends who care about you and want to see you doing better in life and the other type of criticize that reflects insecurities and deep psychological issues.
Before you start looking for flaws in yourself when you get mockedyou should first examine the person who mocked you to find out whether he is the one who really needs help or not.
5 reasons those who mock and humiliate you are mentally unstable
*.1) Projecting their own flaws:One of the best ways People who are so scared to admit the existence of their flaws is to deny their existence and reaffirm their self deception by accusing others of having those flaws. I am You know that person who has a certain flaw but always mocks youfor having it?
*.2) Too insecure to see you doing well :Not everybody feels comfortable in his own skin. Some people feel insecure to the extent that they can't tolerate seeing other people doing things right. By mocking those people and humiliating them the insecure person eases some of his emotional turbulence. It's a fact that cowards don't compliment others because they are too afraid to be left behind if people did what they believe they can't do themselves.(see also How to deal with people who criticize you)
*.3) Failed to have a useful role in life:In the Solid Self confidence programi said that if a person failed to make significant achievements in life he is very likely to turn to useless victories if he was a coward. While brave people start again and keep trying to achieve their goals cowards go for cheap victories by criticizing any person who seems more successful or happier than them.
*.4) Very low self esteem:Why do people feel jealous of others? There are many reasons but the most popular one is believing that someone did what they can't do. Had a person been sure he can make that same achievement his friend did he would have hardly felt jealousof him. Those who have low self esteem feel extremely jealous of people who do things they can't do and so find no better way to feel good than to mock them or humiliate them
*.5) Strong feeling of inferiority:We all experience inferiority feelings at some points of our lives but the brave ones of us usually move in directions that helps them ease this inferiority. For example when a brave person finds that he is earning a very low salary compared to his friends he will usually use this inferiority as a motivating forceto have a better career. But what if the person was inferior and too insecure to do that? He will just criticize and humiliate people to feel good because he can't do any better!
Why you should never take criticism personally
Because the world is full of psychos and mentally unstable people who disguise in the form of sane humans. In most cases you will be criticized or humiliated because of psychological issues that the attacker suffers from and not because you are really bad or defective.
The majority of people don't have a high self esteem.
Brave ones who actually have the courage to follow their dreams are a minority.
Most people feel insecure and hate to see others doing better than them.
Do you still think you should feel bad when you get mocked?
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Marriage Contract, - * She got married without writing the marriage contract – should she repeat the marriage?

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I have been married for a year and a half and when i got married it was to a muslim man and i became muslim after a year and a month of being married we did the marriage islamically correct ie: he asked my fathers permission and had two witnesses and he asked me what i wanted for dawry but we did not make a marriage contract do we need to make one and is the marriage valid?and also i do not have a Wali do i need one?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
May Allaah bless you; we congratulate you for the blessing of Islam, for it is the greatest of blessings. We also congratulate you for your marriage, and we ask Allaah to continue to bless it, and to bless you with a righteous husband and righteous offspring.
Secondly:
If the marriage was done with the agreement of your father and in the presence of two witnesses, then it is a valid marriage, and it does not matter that the marriage contract was not written down or that the mahr (dowry) was not recorded. But the marriage contract should be written down because that helps to protect people’s rights. As your marriage was done before you became Muslim, then your wali (guardian) was your father who was of the same religion as you, so if you want to write it down and document what is in the marriage contract, there is nothing wrong with that.
But now your father is not qualified to act as your guardian, because of the difference in religion.
But you do not need a wali now, because the previous marriage contract is valid, as stated above.
And Allaah knows best.