Engagment, Dought& clear, – * The hadeeth: “Conceal the engagement and proclaim the marriage”

Share ::-

Is it forbidden for muslims to declare the engagement (alkhotoba)? If yes, who are the people supposed to know about the engagement?
Are Close friends allowed to know about it??.
-
Praise be to Allaah.
This hadeeth was narrated by al-Daylami inMusnad al-Firdaws, where it says: “Announce the marriage and conceal the engagement.” This is a da’eef (weak) hadeeth which was classed as such by al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) inal-Silsilah al-Da’eefah(2494), and inDa’eef al-Jaami’ al-Sagheer, 922.
But the first part of it is saheeh with the word “proclaim.”
Ahmad narrated from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn al-Zubayr (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Proclaim marriages.” This hadeeth was classed as hasan by al-Albaani inIrwa’ al-Ghaleel, 1993.
Proclaiming marriages, in the sense of announcing them and publicizing them, is obligatory according to the majority of scholars, indeed it is one of the conditions of a marriage being valid, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no marriage except with a wali (guardian) and two witnesses of good character.” Narrated by al-Bayhaqi from ‘Imraan and ‘Aa’ishah; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami’, 7557.
Some scholars regarded it as mustahabb to conceal the engagement for fear of hasad (destructive envy) which could lead to trouble between the man and the family of his fiancée, as stated inHaashiyat al-‘Adawi ‘ala SharhMukhtasar Khaleel, 3/167.
This is supported by the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Seek help in meeting your needs by keeping quiet, for everyone who is blessed is envied.” Narrated by al-Tabaraani; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami’, 943.
This does not apply only to engagement, rather a person should not show openly the blessings that Allaah has bestowed upon him to one who will envy him for that.
With regard to holding engagement parties, this is something that many people do, and there is nothing wrong with that in sha Allaah. But it should be noted that we must adhere to the limits set by sharee’ah in these parties, so there should be no free mixing of men and women, or use of musical instruments apart from the daff, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) allowed use of the daff in wedding parties.
And Allaah knows best.

PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI

Engagment, Dought& clear, – * Is it permissible to correspond with one’s fiancée via e-mail?

Share ::-

Is it allo wed to send emails to your fiance during engagement to agree about certain things before the wedding with her parents knowing about it and reading each email that I send to her?.
-
Praise be to Allaah.
There is nothing wrong with corresponding with your fiancée in order to agree on matters to do with the wedding, if that is done with the knowledge and supervision of her parents, and it is free of any expressions of love that are not permissible between a man and a non-mahram woman. It is well known that the man is a “stranger” (non-mahram) to his fiancée until the marriage contract is done.
It makes no difference whether this correspondence is done via e-mail or regular mail, or over the telephone, but it is better if the correspondence and conversation is with her guardian only.
Shaykh Saalih al-Fawzaan (may Allaah preserve him) was asked about a man speaking to his fiancée over the phone – is that permissible according to sharee’ah or not?
He replied:
There is nothing wrong with a man speaking to his fiancée over the phone, if that is after they have agreed to marry, and the conversation is in order to discuss different issues and is done only as much as is needed, and there is no fitnah involved. If that is done through her wali (guardian) that is preferable and less dubious.
End quote fromal-Muntaqa, 3/163
And Allaah knows best.

PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI