Engagment, Dought & clear, - * Proposal procedure according to sharee’ah

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What is the Sunnah with regard to proposing marriage? i.e., if a young man wants to get married, should he send someone to the woman’s family to ask for her hand in marriage from her family? If his proposal is accepted and the woman and her family agree, what is the next step before the khutbah, such as the mahr (dowry) and other things that are required of the man? Is it Sunnah to recite al-Faatihah when the dowry is stipulated? Is it Sunnah to give the woman a ring on the day of the engagement and on the day of the wedding or is there any special kind of clothing?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
If a man wants to get married, and he has decided to propose to a particular woman, then he may go to her guardian on his own, or with one of his relatives such as his father or brother, or he may delegate someone else to propose marriage on his behalf. The matter is broad in scope, and prevalent customs should be followed. In some countries it is regarded as improper for the suitor to go on his own, so attention should be paid to that.
What is prescribed in sharee’ah is for the suitor to see the woman to whom he wants to propose marriage, because of the report narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1087), al-Nasaa’i (3235) and Ibn Maajah (1865) from al-Mugheerah ibn Shu’bah (may Allaah be pleased with him), who proposed to a woman and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Go and look at her, for that is more likely to create love between you,” i.e., ,ore likely to establish lasting love between you. This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Tirmidhi.
Secondly:
If the girl and her family agree, then a mahr has to be agreed upon, and the wedding expenses and the wedding date, and so on. This also varies according to local customs, and what the man can afford and what preparations he has made for getting married. Some people do the proposal and the marriage contract in one sitting, and some delay the marriage contract after the engagement, and some they delay the consummation after the marriage contract. All of that is permissible. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) did the marriage contract with ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) when she was six years old then he consummated the marriage with her when she was nine. Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5158).
Thirdly:
It is not sunnah to recite al-Faatihah at the time of engagement or at the time of the marriage contract. Rather the Sunnah is to recite Khutbat al-Haajah. It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) taught us Khutbat al-Haajah, (to be said) at weddings and on other occasions: “Inna al-hamda Lillaahi nasta’eenahu wa nastaghfiruhu, wa na’oodhu bihi min shuroori anfusinaa wa sayi’aati a’maalinaa. Man yahdih Illaahu falaa mudilla lahu wa man yudlil falaa haadiya lahu. Wa ashhadu an laa ilaaha ill-Allaah wa ashhadu anna Muhammadan ‘abduhu wa rasooluhu(Verily, all praise is to Allaah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with Him from the evil of our own souls and from our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger).
‘ Yaa ayyuha’n-naas uttaqu rabbakum alladhi khalaqakum min nafsin waahidatin wa khalaqa minhaa zawjahaa wa baththa minhumaa rijaalan katheeran wa nisaa’an wa’ttaqu-Llaah alladhi tasaa’aloona bihi wa’l-arhaama inna Allaaha kaana ‘alaykum raqeeban(O mankind! Be dutiful to your Lord, Who created you from a single person, and from him He created his wife, and from them both He created many men and women, and fear Allaah through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and (do not cut the relations of) the wombs (kinship) Surely, Allaah is Ever an All-Watcher over you).’ [al-Nisaa’ 4:1]
‘Yaa ayyuha’lladheena aamanu-ttaqu’Llaaha haqqa tuqaatihi wa laa tamootunna illaa wa antum muslimoon(O you who believe! Fear Allaah as He should be feared, and die not except in a state of Islam (as Muslims) with complete submission to Allaah.)’ [Aal ‘Imraan 3:102]
‘Yaa ayyahu’lladheena aamanu-ttaqu’Llaaha wa qooloo qawlan sadeedan yuslih lakum a’maalakum wa yaghfir lakum dhunoobakum wa man yuti’ Allaaha wa rasoolahu fa qad faaza fawzan ‘azeeman(O you who believe! Keep your duty to Allaah and fear Him, and speak (always) the truth). He will direct you to do righteous good deeds and will forgive you your sins. And whosoever obeys Allaah and His Messenger, he has indeed achieved a great achievement (i.e. he will be saved from the Hell‑fire and will be admitted to Paradise)’ [al-Ahzaab 33:70, 71].”
Narrated by Abu Dawood (2118) and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh Abi Dawood.
The Standing Committee for Issuing Fatwas was asked (19/146): Is reciting al-Faatihah when a man gets engaged to a woman an innovation (bid’ah)?
They replied: Reciting al-Faatihah when a man gets engaged to a woman or when the marriage contract is done is an innovation (bid’ah). End quote.
Fourthly:
There is no special clothing to be worn for the engagement, wedding or consummation, for either the man or the woman. Attention should be paid to what the people are accustomed to with regard to that, so long as it is not contrary to sharee’ah. Based on that, there is nothing wrong with the man wearing a suit and so on.
But if the woman is in a place where men can see her, she should wear concealing clothes, just as she should before and after the wedding. But if she is among women, she can adorn herself and wear whatever kind of clothes she wants, but she should avoid extravagance and waste and that which calls to fitnah.
As for wearing a ring, it is not prescribed for men or for women, because that involves imitating the kuffaar.
May Allaah help us and you to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.
And Allaah knows best.

*AS'SALAMU ALAIKUM (WR, WB)*
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Saturday - Dec- - 31 - 2016
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Rabiul Ahir - - 1- -1438
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PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI

Engagment, Dought & clear, - * Is it permissible to refuse a suitor because he does not own an apartment?

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Is it permissible to refuse someone who comes to propose marriage because he does not own an apartment? Is it permissible to refuse to read al-Faatihah for the same reason, that he does not have an apartment? Please note that the girl agrees to this young man and his family are moderately well off. Is the girl’s speaking to the young man behind her family’s backs halaal or haraam?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
If the one who is proposing marriage is acceptable in terms of religious commitment and good character, and he is able to provide accommodation, even if that will be after some time, then he should not be refused, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If there comes to you one with whose character and religious commitment you are pleased, then marry (your female relative under your guardianship) to him, for if you do not do so, there will be tribulation and great mischief on earth.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1084) from Abu Hurayrah; classed as hasan by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Tirmidhi.
But if he is not able to provide accommodation, or he needs a lot of time until he can afford it, then there is nothing wrong with refusing him, because of the harm that will be caused to the girl by tying her to him and waiting a long time to get married. When Mu’aawiyah ibn Abi Sufyaan proposed to Faatimah bint Qays (may Allaah be pleased with them both), Mu’aawiyah was poor, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) advised her to refuse his offer, because he was poor and had no wealth. Narrated by Muslim (1480).
This suitor who is unable to afford the expenses of marriage is addressed by the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning):“And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allaah enriches them of His Bounty” [al-Noor 24:33]and by the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “O young men, whoever among you can afford to get married, then let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding chastity. And whoever is not able to do that, then let him fast, for that will be a shield for him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5065)and Muslim (1400).
Secondly:
It is not prescribed to recite al-Faatihah at the time of engagement, because that is not narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
Thirdly:
The mahr and accommodation are the rights of the wife, and she may be content with a little of that. Her guardian should help her to be chaste. If she accepts someone whose religious commitment and character are pleasing, and he has enough to provide accommodation and the mahr, then it is not permissible to prevent the girl from marrying. But if he does not have anything, then the guardian may refuse the proposal, because the girl’s agreement in this case is based on emotion and lack of experience, and perhaps she is deceived by the suitor.
Fourthly:
It is not permissible for a girl to form a relationship with a non-mahram man, whether he has proposed marriage to her or not, because of the bad consequences to which that may lead, as is obvious, especially if her family have refused his proposal; in that case there is no justifiable reason for him to speak to her.
May Allaah help us all to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.

*AS'SALAMU ALAIKUM (WR, WB)*
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Saturday - Dec- - 31 - 2016
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Rabiul Ahir - - 1- -1438
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PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI

Da'eef (weak) hadeeths, Dought & clear, - * A fabricated hadeeth about the reason why the five daily prayers were prescribed

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How authentic this Hadeeth is:
It was narrated that Ali, may Allah be pleased with him said: “While Allah’s messenger (PBUH) was sitting between the Ansaar and the Muhajireen, a group of Jews came to him and said: “Oh Muhammad! We ask you about words Allah has given to Moses Ben Imraan, Allah will not give them but to a sent messenger or a close angel. The prophet (PBUH) said: “Ask”. They said: “Oh Muhammad! Tell us about the five prayers that Allah obligated upon your nation”. The prophet (PBUH) said:
“Fajr prayer: the sun rises between two horns of Satan, to it every disbeliever prostrates. Every believer who prays Fajr in congregation for forty days Allah will grant him two warrants, to save him from hell and hypocrisy. They said: “The truth you said, Oh Muhammad!”
The prophet (PBUH) continues: “Dhuhr prayer: It is the time that hell flares up during. Every believer who prays this prayer Allah will prevent him from the flames of hell at the Day of Resurrection.
Asr prayer: Is the time of when Adam, peace be upon him, ate from the tree. Every believer who prays this prayer Allah will clear him of all his since as if he was just born.
Maghrib prayer: Is the time Allah accepted Adam’s repentance. Every believer who prays this prayer and asks Allah for anything, Allah will definitely give it to him.
Isha prayer: The grave is dark; the Day of Resurrection is also dark. Every believer who walks in darkness to pray this prayer, Allah will prevent him from hell, and he will given light by which he passes the Siraat (a bridge over hell in the hereafter). It is the prayer that messengers before me prayed. Then he recited saying: “Guard strictly the five obligatory prayers especially the middle Salaat (i.e. ‘Asr)”
May Allah reward you!.
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Praise be to Allaah.
After studying and researching this hadeeth, it is clear that it is false and is a fabrication against the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him); it is not correct to attribute it to him in any circumstances. There is a considerable amount of evidence for that.
1 – We did not find this hadeeth in any of the books that narrate ahaadeeth with isnaad, rather those who mentioned it narrated it from people without an isnaad. It is a well known principle in our religion that any hadeeth that was not narrated by the scholars of hadeeth with a saheeh isnaad is to be rejected.
2 – Another of the obvious signs that it is fabricated is the fact that we found this hadeeth quoted in the book of Abu’l-Layth al-Samarqandi (d. 375 AH). The name of his book isTanbeeh al-Ghaafileen bi Ahaadeeth Sayyid al-Anbiya’ wa’l-Mursaleen(p. 264-265). The scholars have stated that this book of his consists of false and fabricated ahaadeeth. Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) listed him inTalkhees al-Istighaathah(1/73) as being among the authors who could not tell sound reports from weak, and who has no experience of either narrated reports or of narrators, rather they narrated both saheeh and da’eef reports, and they did not distinguish between the two. And Imam al-Dhahabi said in his biography inSiyar A’laam al-Nubala’(16/323): he could accept fabricated ahaadeeth sue to lack of knowledge. End quote.
3 – Another reason why it is to be rejected is that he says of Zuhr prayer that it is a time when Hell is stoked. But what is proven is that the time when Hell is stoked is just before the sun passes the meridian, just before Zuhr, but when the time for Zuhr begins, the time of mercy begins.
It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn al-Saa’ib said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to pray four rak’ahs before Zuhr, after the sun had passed the meridian, and he said: “The gates of heaven are opened and I like to send forth a good deed at this time.”
Narrated by Ahmad (3/411); classed as hasan by Ibn Hajar inNataa’ij al-Afkaar(6/3) and by Shaykh al-Albaani inal-Silsilah al-Saheehah(3404) and by the commentators onal-Musnad.
Another reason is that it goes against that which is mentioned in the saheeh ahaadeeth, that the five daily prayers are one of the unique characteristics of the ummah of Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and they were not enjoined on any of the Prophets who came before him. Although some of the scholars disagreed with that, this is the correct view in sha Allaah. Al-Suyooti wrote a chapter inal-Khasaa’is al-Kubra(2/303) entitled: Chapter on the unique characteristics of (the Prophet) (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in that the five daily prayers were all enjoined upon him, which were not all enjoined for anyone else, and he was the first one to pray ‘Isha’, which no Prophet before him prayed. In this chapter he quoted a number of ahaadeeth, including the following:
It was narrated from Mu’aadh ibn Jabal that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Delay this prayer (‘Isha’) until it is dark, for you have been favoured with it over all other nations, and no nation prayed this prayer before you.”
Narrated by Abu Dawood (421); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh Abi Dawood.
4 – Another sign of the weakness of this hadeeth is that it defines the time when Adam ate from the tree, and the time when Allaah accepted his repentance. Such details are akin to what is mentioned in the Israa’eeliyaat (reports from Jewish sources) and reports that are narrated from the People of the Book, which makes it likely that this report was taken from them.
To sum up, this report is false and has no basis, so it is not permissible to narrate it or attribute it to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), or to quote it on websites or in chat rooms.
And Allaah knows best.

*AS'SALAMU ALAIKUM (WR, WB)*
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Thursday - Dec- - 29 - 2016
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Rabiul Awwal - - 28- -1438
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PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI