I married a foreign woman after she became Muslim in a shar'i marriage
in accordance with the laws of Allah and the Sunnah of His Messenger,
and I concealed from her the fact that I was married before. Is my
marriage legitimate or do I have to tell her that I am married and
that she is the second wife? Please note that I concealed this matter
from her because the country in which we live does not allow plural
marriage.
Praise be to Allaah.
It is not obligatory for the husband to tell the second wife that he
is already married and this does not affect the validity of his
marriage to her. So long as the marriage contract fulfilled the
necessary requirements and conditions, then it is valid.
Shaykh Ibn Jibreen (may Allah preserve him) was asked: Is it essential
for the marriage to be valid that a man should inform the woman he
wants to marry that he is married to another one, if he is not asked
about that? Are there any consequences if he denies it if he is asked?
He replied: The man is not obliged to tell the woman or her family
that he is married if they do not ask him, but that cannot usually be
hidden because marriage is not usually done except after a period of
enquiring and asking about each of the two partners and verifying that
they are suitable. But it is not permissible to conceal any facts, and
if either party tells a lie and the other party acts on the basis of
it, then there is the option of cancelling it. If he says that he is
not married and is lying about that, then the woman has the option of
annulling the marriage. If they say that she was a virgin when she is
not, then he has the option of going ahead with the marriage or
cancelling it.
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Plural marriage and fair treatment of co-wives, Dought & clear, - * If my husband takes a second wife, will I be rewarded?
What is the reward, "ajr", for the first wife having patience ,"sabr",
when her husband takes a second wife? Is there a special reward in
this case, or is it the same reward for all women who obey their
husbands and make their religious duties? If I would get to know about
a special reward, things would be easier to accept. Someone said that
the reward for this kind of woman was more than the reward for a
mu´min leaving for jihad. And since Hajj is the jihad of a woman,
accepting polygamy for the first wife is more than jihad. Is ther
daleel for this, or do you know about another reward?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
We do not know of any saheeh evidence which refers to the reward
mentioned, but al-Tabaraani narrated from Ibn Mas'ood that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah has decreed
jealousy for women and jihad for men, so whoever bears that with
patience out of faith and in the hope of reward will have a reward
like that of a martyr." This hadeeth was classed as da'eef (weak) by
al-Albaani inDa'eef al-Jaami' al-Sagheer, no. 1626.
Secondly:
A woman's being patient in obeying her husband is one of the means of
entering Paradise, as it says in the hadeeth narrated by Ibn Hibbaan:
"If a woman offers her five daily prayers and fasts her month (i.e.,
Ramadaan) and guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be
said to her: 'Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise
you wish.'" This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh
al-Jaami' al-Sagheer, no. 660.
Her patience in putting up with her husband's marrying a second wife
will bring a special reward over and above that, for several reasons:
1 – Her husband's marrying another wife is regarded as a test and
trial for her, and if she bears that with patience she will have the
reward for being patient in the face of a trial, as Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning):
"Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full,
without reckoning"
[al-Zumar 39:10]
According to the hadeeth: "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor
sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, not even a thorn
that pricks him, but Allaah will expiate his sins thereby."
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5642; Muslim, 2573, from the hadeeth of Abu
Sa'eed and Abu Hurayrah.
Al-Tirmidhi (2399) narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Trials will continue to
befall the believer, man or woman, concerning himself, his child and
his wealth, until he meets Allaah with no sin on him." Classed as
saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami', no. 5815.
2 – If a woman accepts that and treats her husband and the other wife
well, she will have the reward of al-muhsineen. Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning):
"Verily, he who fears Allaah with obedience to Him (by abstaining from
sins and evil deeds, and by performing righteous good deeds), and is
patient, then surely, Allaah makes not the reward of the Muhsinoon
(good‑doers) to be lost"
[Yoosuf 12:90]
"Is there any reward for good other than good?"
[al-Rahmaan 55:60]
"And verily, Allaah is with the Muhsinoon (good-doers)"
[al-'Ankaboot 29:69]
3 – If she feels angry because of that, but she controls her anger –
and controlling one's tongue is part of controlling one's anger –
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"…who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily, Allaah loves
Al-Muhsinoon (the good‑doers)"
[Aal 'Imraan 3:134]
This reward is in addition to the woman's reward for obeying her
husband under ordinary circumstances.
A wise woman should accept whatever Allaah decrees for her, and she
should realize that her husband's marrying another woman is something
permissible, so she should not object to it. It may be that this
(second) marriage will make him more chaste and prevent him from doing
something haraam.
It is very unfortunate that some women object less to their husbands
doing haraam things than to their marrying another woman in a
permissible manner. This is a sign of their lack of reason and
religious commitment.
Women should follow the good example of the wives of the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and his companions, who
were patient and sought reward even though many of them felt jealous.
If your husband goes ahead and takes a second wife then you have to be
patient and content and treat him well so that you can attain the
reward of the patient and the doers of good.
Note that this life is the life of trials and tests, and how quickly
it ends. So congratulations to the one who is patient in obeying
Allaah in this life until he attains eternal delight in the gardens of
Paradise.
And Allaah knows best.
when her husband takes a second wife? Is there a special reward in
this case, or is it the same reward for all women who obey their
husbands and make their religious duties? If I would get to know about
a special reward, things would be easier to accept. Someone said that
the reward for this kind of woman was more than the reward for a
mu´min leaving for jihad. And since Hajj is the jihad of a woman,
accepting polygamy for the first wife is more than jihad. Is ther
daleel for this, or do you know about another reward?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
We do not know of any saheeh evidence which refers to the reward
mentioned, but al-Tabaraani narrated from Ibn Mas'ood that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah has decreed
jealousy for women and jihad for men, so whoever bears that with
patience out of faith and in the hope of reward will have a reward
like that of a martyr." This hadeeth was classed as da'eef (weak) by
al-Albaani inDa'eef al-Jaami' al-Sagheer, no. 1626.
Secondly:
A woman's being patient in obeying her husband is one of the means of
entering Paradise, as it says in the hadeeth narrated by Ibn Hibbaan:
"If a woman offers her five daily prayers and fasts her month (i.e.,
Ramadaan) and guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be
said to her: 'Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise
you wish.'" This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh
al-Jaami' al-Sagheer, no. 660.
Her patience in putting up with her husband's marrying a second wife
will bring a special reward over and above that, for several reasons:
1 – Her husband's marrying another wife is regarded as a test and
trial for her, and if she bears that with patience she will have the
reward for being patient in the face of a trial, as Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning):
"Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full,
without reckoning"
[al-Zumar 39:10]
According to the hadeeth: "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor
sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, not even a thorn
that pricks him, but Allaah will expiate his sins thereby."
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5642; Muslim, 2573, from the hadeeth of Abu
Sa'eed and Abu Hurayrah.
Al-Tirmidhi (2399) narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Trials will continue to
befall the believer, man or woman, concerning himself, his child and
his wealth, until he meets Allaah with no sin on him." Classed as
saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami', no. 5815.
2 – If a woman accepts that and treats her husband and the other wife
well, she will have the reward of al-muhsineen. Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning):
"Verily, he who fears Allaah with obedience to Him (by abstaining from
sins and evil deeds, and by performing righteous good deeds), and is
patient, then surely, Allaah makes not the reward of the Muhsinoon
(good‑doers) to be lost"
[Yoosuf 12:90]
"Is there any reward for good other than good?"
[al-Rahmaan 55:60]
"And verily, Allaah is with the Muhsinoon (good-doers)"
[al-'Ankaboot 29:69]
3 – If she feels angry because of that, but she controls her anger –
and controlling one's tongue is part of controlling one's anger –
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"…who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily, Allaah loves
Al-Muhsinoon (the good‑doers)"
[Aal 'Imraan 3:134]
This reward is in addition to the woman's reward for obeying her
husband under ordinary circumstances.
A wise woman should accept whatever Allaah decrees for her, and she
should realize that her husband's marrying another woman is something
permissible, so she should not object to it. It may be that this
(second) marriage will make him more chaste and prevent him from doing
something haraam.
It is very unfortunate that some women object less to their husbands
doing haraam things than to their marrying another woman in a
permissible manner. This is a sign of their lack of reason and
religious commitment.
Women should follow the good example of the wives of the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and his companions, who
were patient and sought reward even though many of them felt jealous.
If your husband goes ahead and takes a second wife then you have to be
patient and content and treat him well so that you can attain the
reward of the patient and the doers of good.
Note that this life is the life of trials and tests, and how quickly
it ends. So congratulations to the one who is patient in obeying
Allaah in this life until he attains eternal delight in the gardens of
Paradise.
And Allaah knows best.