Wednesday, September 17, 2014

For children, - Rewards for taking full Responsibility



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What is one of the most boring and tiresome words ever? Like discipline, responsibility is one of those words you have probably heard so many times from authority figures that you have developed a bit of an allergy to it. Still, it's one of the most important things to grow and to feel good about your life. Without it as a foundation nothing else in any personal development book really works.
It's been said that the line between childhood and adulthood is crossed when we move from saying 'It got lost' to 'I lost it.' Indeed, being accountable, understanding and accepting the role our choices play in the things that happen are crucial signs of emotional and moral maturity. That's why responsibility is one of the main pillars of good character.
Many people have been refusing to grow up and avoiding the burdens implied in being accountable. Yes, responsibility sometimes requires us to do things that are unpleasant or even frightening. It asks us to carry our own weight, prepare and set goals and exercise the discipline to reach our aspirations.
But the benefits of accepting responsibility far outweigh the short-lived advantages of refusing to do so. No one makes his or her life better by avoiding responsibility. In fact, irresponsibility is a form of self-imposed servitude to circumstances and to other people.
People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them. - George Bernard Shaw
Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment and learn again to exercise his will - his personal responsibility in the realm of faith and morals. - Albert Schweitzer
Following incident illustrates blaming others and not taking full responsibility:
Bernard L. Brown, Jr., once worked in a hospital where a patient knocked over a cup of water, which spilled on the floor beside the patient's bed. The patient was afraid he might slip on the water if he got out of the bed, so he asked a nurse's aide to mop it up. The patient didn't know it, but the hospital policy said that small spills were the responsibility of the nurse's aides while large spills were to be mopped up by the hospital's housekeeping group.
The nurse's aide decided the spill was a large one and she called the housekeeping group. A housekeeper arrived and declared the spill a small one. An argument followed.
"It's not my responsibility," said the nurse's aide, "because it's a large puddle." The housekeeper did not agree. "Well, it's not mine," she said, "the puddle is too small."
The exasperated patient listened for a time, then took a pitcher of water from his night table and poured the whole thing on the floor. "Is that a big enough puddle now for you two to decide?" he asked. It was, and that was the end of the argument.
So, responsibility is about our ability to respond to circumstances and to choose the attitudes, actions and reactions that shape our lives. It is a concept of power that puts us in the driver's seat. The grand panorama of the potential of our lives can only be appreciated when we begin to be accountable and self-reliant.
If you want more control over your life and the pleasures, power of freedom and independence, all you have to do is be responsible. Responsible people not only depend on themselves, but show others that they can be depended on.





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Prayer, - Dought & clear, - * Stopping one’sprayer in cases of necessity



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Is it permissible to stop one’s prayer if the warning siren goes off in the case of an accident?
Praise be to Allaah.
If the accident is major and serious, then it is OK to stop one’s prayer; if it is a minor incident that can be dealt with after completing the prayer, then it is not permissible. The scholars said: it is obligatory to stop one's prayer in order to save a negligent person from a fatal accident. For example, if you are praying and you see a snake approaching a man who is sitting down and has not noticed it. If it is heading for him, you have to stop your prayer and tell him so that he will not be bitten, possibly fatally. Or if you see a blind man walking in front of you whilst you are praying, and he is heading towards a well, and you are afraid that he may fall into it, then you have to stop your prayer and save him from that fatal accident, even if this means stopping your prayer. The same applies in cases of fire, etc.
But if the siren goes off for a minor matter which can be dealt with after completing the prayer and it will not be too late if you complete the prayer first, then it is not permissible to stop your prayer before you have completed it, because this accident can be dealt with after completing the prayer, without anyone coming to further harm. And Allaah knows best.





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Prayer, - Dought & clear, - * Is it permissible to give salaams tosomeone who is praying?



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Is it permissible for a Muslim to give salaams to a Muslim when he is praying or he is making dhikr or du’aa’?
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly, it is prescribed for a Muslim to initiate the greeting of salaam to his Muslim brother when he is praying, but the one who is praying should not return the salaams whilst praying, except by making a gesture in a manner that will maintain the validity of his prayer, because it was narrated that Ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:
“I asked Bilaal, How did the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) return their salaam when they greeted him whilst he was praying? He said, With a gesture of his hand.”
(Narrated by Ahmad, 6/12; Abu Dawood, 1/569, no. 927; al-Tirmidhi, 2/204, no. 368; al-Bayhaqi, 2/262; also narrated by the five).
It was also narrated from him that Suhayb (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “I passed by the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) whilst he was praying. I greeted him with salaam and he responded with a gesture.” And he said: I am not sure whether he said “a gesture with his fingers”.(Narrated by the five, apart from Ibn Maajah. Al-Tirmidhi said: both hadeeths are saheeh in my view).
It was reported that Umm Salamah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: I heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbidding us to pray two rak’ahs after ‘Asr, then I saw him praying them when he prayed ‘Asr. She said, he entered and there were some women from Bani Haraam, from among the Ansaar, with me. He started to pray them [these two rak’ahs after ‘Asr], so I sent a young girl to him, and I told her, ‘Stand beside him and say to him, Umm Salamah is saying to you, O Messenger of Allaah, I heard you forbidding us to do these two rak’ahs and now I see you praying them. If he makes a gesture with his hand then leave him and go back.’ So the young girl did that and he made a gesture with his hand, so she left him and went back. When he finished praying, he said: ‘O daughter of Abu Umayyah, you asked about the two rak’ahs after ‘Asr. Some people from Banu ‘Abd al-Qays came to me and kept me from doing the two rak’ahs after Zuhr, and that is what these were.’”(Narrated by al-Bukhaari and Muslim).
These ahaadeeth indicate that it is prescribed to say salaams to a person whilst he is praying, and that he should respond to the greeting with a gesture, because this is what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) approved of initiating the salaam, and he returned the greeting with a gesture only.
Secondly, it is prescribed for the Muslim to initiate the greeting to one who is engaged in making dhikr or du’aa’, because it was reported that Abu Waaqid al-Laythi (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “Whilst the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was sitting in the mosque and there were some people with him, three people came in. Two of them came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and one went away. When they came up to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), they greeted him with salaam. One of them found a space in the circle and sat down, and the other sat down behind him. The third one turned and went away. When the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) had finished (his talk), he said: ‘Shall I tell you about these three people? One of them turned to Allaah so Allaah accepted him; the second felt shy so Allaah will feel shy (to punish him); and the third turned away so Allaah turned away from him.”(Narrated by Maalik in al-Muwatta’, 2/960; Ahmad, 5/219; al-Bukhaari, 1/24, 122; Muslim, 4/1713, no. 2176; al-Tirmidhi, 5/73, no. 2724; Abu Ya’laa, 3/33, no. 1445).
And inal-Saheehaynit is narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that a Bedouin entered the mosque and prayed, but he did not do the rukoo’ and sujood properly. Then he came and greeted the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) with salaam. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) returned his greeting then said, “Go back and pray, for you have not prayed.”
And Allaah is the Source of strength. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions, and grant them peace.




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Prayer, - Dought & clear, - * Wardingoff the insinuating whispers of the Shaytaan



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Sometimes the imaam recites a long soorah and my mind wanders unintentionally. What should I do? Is it permissible for me to repeat some aayahs of the Qur’aan or du’aa’s, or should I listen to the imaam’s reading?
Praise be to Allaah.
Push away the worldly thoughts that come to you whilst praying as much as you can, and listen to the imaam’s recitation and ponder the meanings of what he is reciting, so that you may benefit from it, avoid letting your thoughts wander and ward off the insinuating whispers of the Shaytaan. Recite al-Faatihah in both the silent and loud prayers (where the recitation is done silently or out loud), and recite another soorah or passage of the Qur’aan in the silent prayer, focusing on the meaning of the words. Perhaps by this means Allaah will help you to focus your mind and overcome this lack of concentration. It is also prescribed for you to seek refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan when you face too many insinuating whispers.
And Allaah is the source of strength. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions, and grant them peace.




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