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Normal and everyday activities become acts of worship if they are done for the sake of pleasing Allaah. The regular and consistent deeds are the best among these deeds. `Aa`ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, said that Allaah’s Messenger, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"The deeds most loved by Allaah are those done regularly, even if they are small.”]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[ This means that we do not need to do anything spectacular in our day to obtain rewards from Allaah, but we should establish some type of routine that incorporates not only the prayer but also reciting the Quran, Du’aa` )supplication(, Thikr )mention of Allaah(, and other good deeds. This will increase the serenity, patience, and enthusiasm of the believer.
Early morning
This article is the first in a series aimed at bringing the spiritual side in the everyday life of a married Muslim woman:
Wake at night to perform Tahajjud.The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said:"The best )most rewarding prayer after the obligatory prayer is Tahajjud, night prayer.”]Ahmad and Muslim[ It is best to do this toward the last third of the night as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:“Allaah descends every night in the last third of the night ]in a way that befits His majesty[ and says: Is there anyone invoking Me that I may respond to his invocation? Is there anyone asking of Me so that I may grant him his request? Is there anyone asking My Forgiveness, so that I may forgive him?"]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[ It is even better if the husband and wife perform the Tahajjud together as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:“When a man wakes his wife up at night and they perform two Rak'ah together, they are written down among the men and women who remember Allaah."]Abu Daawood[ After this prayer, one can return to bed until the Fajr prayer.
Upon awakening in the morning, say this Du`aa`:"Al-Hamdu Lillaah, praise be to Allaah who brought me to life after giving me death, and to Him is the resurrection."]Al-Bukhaari[ One should also greet the other members of the household who are awake. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"O my son )to Anas(, when you enter to where your family is, say Salaam. It is a blessing on you and on the people of your house."]At-Tirmithi[
When getting dressed, say this Du`aa`:"AI-Hamdu Lillaah, praise be to Allaah, who clothed me with this, and who provided me with it, without any power or might of mine.”]Abu Daawood[
Make Wudu or Ghusl )except for menstruating or postnatal women(:
Du`aa` when entering the bathroom:“In the name of Allaah, O Allaah, I seek refuge in You from the male and female devils."]Abu Daawood[
Be sure to use the left hand in the bathroom:“`Aa`ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, said that the right hand was used by Allaah’s Messenger for his ablution and for taking food, and his left hand was used in the toilet and the like.”]Abu Daawood[
Say “Bismillaah” and make Wudu )ablution(. It is also encouraged to use the Miswak or toothbrush, although it is not an obligatory aspect of Wudu. The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said:“If I had not found it difficult for my followers, I would have ordered them to clean their teeth with Miswak for every prayer.”]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
Du`aa` after finishing Wudu:“I testify that there is no god but Allaah, Alone, having no partner; and I testify that Muhammad, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, is His servant and Messenger, O Allaah, make me of those who continually repent and purify themselves.”]At-Tirmithi[
Du`aa` when leaving the bathroom,")I ask for( Your forgiveness."]Abu Daawood[
Perform Fajr Prayer: 2 Rak'ah of Sunnah and the two obligatory Rak’ah )except for menstruating or post-natal women(. It is important to remember that the prayer should be completed soon after the time has begun. The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, was asked which deed was loved most by Allaah, The Exalted. He, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"The prayer which is performed at its time."]Al-Bukhaari[ Even if a woman is busy with another task, she should interrupt this and perform her Prayer .
A woman should try to develop Khushoo` )sincere submission( in prayer since this will be the first thing that she will be accountable for on Judgment Day. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"When you stand up for your Prayer , make it as if it was your last Prayer ; do not say a word for which you will have to make an excuse the coming day; and build no hope on what is in the hands of men."]Ahmad[
It is often asked if women need to make the Athaan and Iqaamah if they are leading the Prayer or praying by them selves. This is not required for women, although they may do it if they wish. In terms of the manner of performing the prayer, a woman's prayer is no different from that of a man's.
Recite the Quran.Early morning is often a good time to recite the Quran, especially if the children are still sleeping and the house is quiet. This allows one to fully concentrate and obtain the most benefit. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:")The recital of( the Quran at dawn is always witnessed - the angels of the night and the angels of the day witness it."]At-Tirmithi[ If one's spouse is available, this would be the ideal time to strengthen the marriage by reciting the Quran together and praising Allaah for His blessings. The issue of women touching the Quran during menstruation is often debated. Most scholars say that a woman should not touch the Quran during this time. However, even if she does not, she may still recite from memory or listen to tapes if she fears she may forget the Quran. This should be an incentive to memorize larger portions of the Quran, which can also be done during this early morning time.
Work on a project that will benefit the Muslim community in some way.Before the children awake and after reciting the Quran, it would be a good time to put energy into some project of interest to which one is committed. This may include such things as acquiring more Islamic knowledge by reciting or listening to tapes, writing articles, preparing for circles, developing some type of program )such as a Children's circle, Muslim scouting program, etc.(, keeping in touch with other sisters through e-mail, social service projects, etc. There are many opportunities for sisters to benefit themselves )through Allaah's rewards( and the community.
Mid and late morning
Prepare a healthy breakfast for the family. It is important to remember that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to eat a very healthy food such as dates, cucumbers, bread, meat, milk, etc…. Much of the unhealthy food that we have now was obviously not available at the time of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. It is best to avoid processed foods and to use items that are the most natural. Allaah Knows what is best for His Creation and He has provided us with all that we need. We should take care of our children's physical needs in the best manner possible. Cleanliness is also an important element of the Islamic faith and should be observed in all matters, especially in food preparation and eating.
Du`aa` when beginning the meal."O Allaah! Bless whatever You provided for us and save us from the punishment of the Hellfire. Bismillaah."The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, told a boy who was attending a meal with him:"... Mention the name of Allaah, and eat with your right hand and eat of the food that is nearer to you."]Al-Bukhaari[ Spend some time in conversation during the meal since this was encouraged by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.
Duaa after finishing the meal"Praise be to Allaah, who gave us to eat and to drink and made us Muslims."]Abu Daawood and At-Tirmithi[ It is important to remember not to overeat due to the unhealthiness of this behavior for physical and spiritual reasons. The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"The son of Adam fills no vessel more displeasing to Allaah than his stomach. A few morsels should be enough for him to preserve his strength. If he must fill it, then he should allow a thin his food, a third for his food, a third for his drink and leave a third empty for easy breathing."]At-Tirmithi[ Overeating can lead to laziness and lethargy, and make acts of worship seem laborious, making it more likely that one will delay or avoid them.
Spend quality time with the children.Older children may need to be sent off to school, while younger children will continue to require the attention of their mother. Raising children is the most important and most honorable role for a woman. It is essential to include quality time with the children in a busy daily schedule. This should be given priority over household chores and other activities, although it should not interfere with obligatory acts of worship. Quality time may include such things as reading books about Islam, teaching Arabic, reciting the Quran together, playing games, going to the park, and much more. The emphasis should be on the children's spiritual, intellectual, emotional and physical development. Doing this early in the day also makes it more likely that children will be content to play with themselves later on, freeing time for other activities.
Perform Ad-Dhuhaa prayer:Abu Hurayrah said:"My friend )the Prophet( advised me to observe three things, not to abandon them till I die; to fast three days a month, to perform two Rak’ah of Dhuhaa )forenoon( Prayer , and to perform Witr before sleeping."]Bukhaari and Muslim[ This is one of the forgotten Sunnah of the Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, that needs to be revived. Two or more Rak’ah should be prayed some time after the sun rises until a few moments before noon. The preferred time is when it is extremely hot, which usually occurs around the hour before noon. A mother has a wonderful opportunity to renew this Sunnah by teaching her children from a very young age. Have a peaceful and blessed morning!
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Afternoon
Preparing a healthy lunch.
Performing Thuhr prayer
)4 Rak'ah of Sunnah, 4 Rak'ah Fard, and 2 Rak'ah Sunnah(
Regarding the Sunnah prayer, `Aa`ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, said:"When the Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, used to be in my house, he would offer four Sunnah Rak’ahs before Thuhr, then he would go and lead the congregation, and thereafter return home and offer two Sunnah Rak’ahs. Similarly, he would lead the Maghrib prayer in the congregation and come back and offer two Sunnah Rak’ahs. Likewise after having led the `lshaa` prayer, he would come back to my apartment and offer two Sunnah Rak’ahs.”]Muslim[
Obviously, for women it is preferable to perform both Sunnah and Fard Prayer within the home; Umm Humayd As-Sa'idiyyah said:“O, Prophet of Allaah, I love praying behind you." Thereupon the Prophet of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, told her: ''I had known that you like praying with me. But your prayer in your private room is better than your prayer in other rooms of your house, and your prayer in other rooms of your house is better than your prayer in the halls of your house, and your prayer in the halls of your house is better than your prayer in your community's mosque, and your prayer in your community's mosque is better than your prayer in my mosque."]Ahmad and At-Tabaraani[ However, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, did not forbid women from going to the mosque as he said:“Do not prohibit the female-servants of Allaah from coming to the mosque of Allaah. When a wife of one of you asks for permission to go to the mosque, she should not be refused this permission."]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
„X Saying this Du`aa` when leaving the house:If a woman goes to the mosque or must leave the house for her needs or the needs of the family, she should say this Du`aa`, "In the name of Allaah, I trust in Allaah, there is no might and power but in Allaah.” Allaah's Messenger, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"When a man leaves his house, saying: ‘In the name of Allaah, I trust in Allaah there is no might and power but in Allaah’, it is said to him at that time, ‘Your are guided, you are taken care of, you are protected.' Then Satan turns away from him, and another Satan says, `How can a man approach you, who is already guided, cared for and protected?"']Abu Daawood[
„X Du`aa` when entering the house:The prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"When a man enters his house, let him say: '0 Allaah, I ask of You the good of entry and the good of exit. In the name of Allaah, we enter; in the name of Allaah, we exit. And upon Allaah, our Lord, we depend.' Then he should say Salaam to his family.”]Abu Daawood[
Performing ‘Asr prayer:
)4 Rak’ah Fard(
The prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"He who leaves the ‘Asr prayer is like one who has lost )some of( his family and his property."]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[ The significance of the afternoon prayer is often likened to that of Fajr prayer. The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said:“A person will not be sent to Hell who has offered his Fajr prayer and his ‘Asr prayer.”]Muslim[
Evening
Preparing a healthy dinner for the family.
Perform the Maghrib prayer
)3 Rak’ah Fard and 2 Rak’ah Sunnah(
It is advised that the family makes the prayer together in congregation at times when two or more are present. Young children may even be encouraged to participate in the activity. This is a good way of strengthening family ties and setting a positive example for the children.
Conducting a study circle within the home:
The evening is a nice time to gather the family members for the study of the Quran, Ahadeeth, Seerah )Biography of the Prophet( and other areas of Islamic knowledge.
This is something that can be made a regular part of the daily or weekly schedule.
Although parents will be primarily responsible for the topics and discussions, older children may be given assignments to prepare for the group. Encouraging them to actively participate will enhance their excitement and interest in learning. Creative and engaging methods may be used to maintain the attention of younger children, although they should not be forced to sit for long periods of time. Regarding the importance of teaching, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"Each of you is a guardian, and each of you will be asked about your guardianship. The leader )Muslim ruler( is a guardian, and the man is a guardian over the people of his house, and the woman is a guardian over her husband's house and children. So each of you is a guardian, and each of you will be asked about your guardianship."]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
Holding a family discussion:
The evening is also an ideal time for family discussions since most family members are likely to be present. The family may discuss happenings or special events of the day, issues that need to be considered together, or other matters of importance such as rules or schedules. Doing this on a regular basis will instill responsibility and respect in children and make them feel that they are a vital part of the family unit. As children mature and reach the age of responsibility, it becomes necessary to include them in discussions and decision-making, particularly in matters that pertain to them. This is actually a time for them to learn how a family should function and the most effective ways to plan and make decisions, since they will eventually begin a family of their own. Obviously, the parents should provide acceptable role models that the children will want to emulate.
„X Du`aa` after a meeting or gathering:"Glory be to You, O Allaah, and praise be to You. I witness that none is worthy of worship but You. I seek Your forgiveness and I turn to you in repentance." ]At-Tirmithi[
Securing the house:
Keep children in after the darkness begins and be sure to secure the house. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"When the darkness of the night or evening )comes(, then keep in your children, for satan is then out. And when an hour of the night has gone, then let them go and close the doors, and invoke the name of Allaah, for satan does not open a closed door, and tie up your water-skins and invoke the name of Allaah, and cover your vessels and invoke the name of Allaah, even when you put something on them, and put out your lights."
Reviewing the day for acts of charity:
There should be at least one act of charity in each person's day and this can come in many forms. Allaah's Messenger, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"Charity is due upon every limb of a human being on each day that the sun rises. To act justly between two )people( is charity. To help a man with his riding beast, or to load his provisions on it or lift them up for him is charity. A good word is charity. Every step going to prayer is a charity. Removing from the road what causes harm is charity."]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
Performing `Ishaa` Prayer
)4 Rak’ah Fard and 2 Rak’ah Sunnah(
Allaah's Messenger, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"No Prayer is more burdensome to the hypocrites than the Fajr prayer and the `Ishaa` prayer, but if they knew what blessings lie in them, they would certainly come for them, even if they had to crawl."]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[ It is best to perform the `Ishaa` prayer before one-half of the night is over.
Performing Witr Prayer
)an odd number of Rak’ah(
The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:“Allaah is single, He loves what is single, therefore, do the Witr, O you people of the Quran."]At-Tirmithi and Abu Daawood[ He also said:"He who fears that he will not get up in the later part of the night should do the Witr in the first part of it. And he who eagerly wishes to get up in the later part of it should perform the Witr then, for the prayer in the later part of the night is witnessed and that is more excellent."]Muslim[ It is recommended to include the supplication of Qunoot )the standing-in-Prayer supplication( in the Witr Prayer . The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to recite the Qunoot Du`aa` after raising his head from the position of bowing, saying:"O Allaah, guide us among those whom You have guided and preserve us from all ill among those whom You have preserved. Take us for friends among those whom You have taken and bless for us that which You have given. Protect us from the evil of that which You have ordained, for it is You who ordains and none can ordain upon You. Indeed, never is he abased whom You have taken for a friend, and none is honored whom You have taken for a foe. Blessed are You, our Lord, and Exalted. There is no escape from You except in You. And may Allaah bless Prophet Muhammad."]An-Nasaa'ee[
„X Du`aa` before sleeping:The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"When one of you goes to bed, he should dust it with the edge of his gown three times and then say: `0 Allaah, in Your name I die and I live. In Your name, my Lord, I place my side )upon this bed(, and through You I raise it. If you retain my soul, have mercy upon it; if You release it, then protect it as You protect Your righteous servants.”]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[ It is also beneficial to read some chapters or verses from the Quran before sleeping. `Aa`ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, said:"Every night when the Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, would go to bed, he would cup his hands together and blow into them after reciting Surah Al-Ikhlaas, Surah Al-Falaq, and Surah An-Naas. He would then rub his hands over whatever he was able from his body, beginning with his head, face and the front of his body. He used to do that three times.”]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[ The verse of Al-Kursiyy ]2:225[ is also a special verse. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:"When you go to your bed, recite the verse of Al-Kursiyy, ‘Allaah! There is no god but Him, the Ever-living, the One Who Sustains and Protects all that exists’ to the end, for then there will remain over you a guardian from Allaah, and Satan will not come near you until morning."]Al-Bukhaari[ It is also preferred to perform ablution before sleeping and to lie on the right side.
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I have read your answers regarding woman taking her husbands name and i understand that is is not acceptable. I would still like to now, if it would be possible for a converted woman in that case when the woman originally has her mothers name because her parents were not married when she was born, and it is not possible for her to take her fathers name, since he is not alive anymore.
Praise be to Allaah.
Zina (adultery or fornication) is forbidden in all the laws that Allaah revealed to His Messengers, and Islam approves of the marriages of followers of other religion who did not enter Islam subject to two conditions:
1 – That it was in accordance with their own laws
2 – That they do not refer to us for judgement concerning the marriage contract.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
The companions of Maalik and al-Shaafa’i, and the companions of Ahmad such as al-Qaadi Abu Ya’la and Ibn ‘Aqeel, and later scholars, said that reference concerning the marriage of a kaafir should be made to their own customs. Whatever they regard as a marriage among them, it is permissible to approve of if they become Muslim and refer to us for judgement, provided there is no impediment to this marriage. But if they believed that it was not a marriage, then it is not permissible to approve of it. End quote.
Majmoo’ al-Fataawa(29/12).
Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
If the marriage is valid according to Islamic sharee’ah, then it is valid, but if it is invalid according to the dictates of Islamic sharee’ah, then they may approve of it subject to two conditions:
1 – That they regard it as valid according to their laws
2 – That they do not refer to us (for judgement).
If they do not believe that it is valid, then they must be separated, and if they refer to us for judgement, we must examine the case. If it is before the marriage contract then we must do the marriage contract according to our laws. If it is after the marriage contract, we must examine it further. If the woman was permissible at that time, then we may approve of it, and if she was not permissible then we must separate them. The evidence for these things is what happened when a kaafir became Muslim at the time of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). He approved of those couple who had married during the Jaahiliyyah and did not object to that. This indicates that things may be left as they are. End quote.
Al-Sharh al-Mumti’(12/239, 240).
With regard to zina and so-called relationships, all of that is invalid according to their laws and ours. It is the result of the misguidance in their lives, behaviour and customs.
Muslim (1700) narrated from al-Bara’ ibn ‘Aazib the story of the stoning of the two Jews who committed zina, and how, even when the Jews distorted the Torah and concealed that which Allaah had revealed, they did not regard zina as permissible, rather they changed the punishment for it and introduced flogging and blackening of the face with coal instead of stoning.
The Christians did likewise. In the Gospel of Matthew 19:18 it says: “Jesus [said], ‘Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not give false testimony…’”
In the Gospel of Mark 10:19 and the Gospel of Luke 18:20 it says: “You know the commandments: ‘Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not give false testimony’”
Hence we say: If these parents were married – even of that was according to the religion of Christianity or Judaism – then their marriage is approved and the daughter should be named after the father. But if the daughter was the result of an illicit relationship, then she should not be named after the zaani, rather she should be named after her mother, as she is at present.
In Islam the scholars are unanimously agreed that the illegitimate child should not be named after the zaani if the zaani does not ask for him to be named after him. Rather the majority of scholars said that he should not be named after him even if the zaani wants that.
It is not the issue – as mentioned in the question – of whether the zaani is still alive or not; rather the issue is that the relationship between them was not one of marriage, and the daughter was the result of that relationship.
Islam forbids attributing the child to anyone other than his father. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Call them (adopted sons) by (the names of) their fathers, that is more just with Allaah. But if you know not their father’s (names, call them) your brothers in Faith and Mawaaleekum (your freed slaves). And there is no sin on you concerning that in which you made a mistake, except in regard to what your hearts deliberately intend. And Allaah is Ever Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”
[al-Ahzaab 33:5]
It was narrated from Abu Dharr (may Allaah have mercy on him) that he heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “There is no man who knowingly attributes himself to someone other than his father but he has committed an act of kufr, and whoever claims to belong to people to whom he does not belong, let him take his place in Hell.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (3317) and Muslim (61).
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
Some commentators said: The reason why this is described as kufr is that he is telling a lie against Allaah; it is as if he is saying: Allaah created me from the sperm of So and so, when that is not the case, because he was created from someone else.
Fath al-Baari(12/55):
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “One of the greatest of falsehoods is for a man attribute himself to someone other than his father.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (3318).
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever knowingly attributes himself to someone other than his father, Paradise will be forbidden to him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (4072) and Muslim (63).
To sum up:
The illegitimate child – whether he is born to Muslim or non-Muslim parents – cannot be attributed to the zaani, rather he must be named after his mother. The situation of this new Muslim sister is correct. If she was not able to call herself after the man or the woman then she could – as a case of necessity – call herself by a name that is not specific to any known person; rather she may choose a name that consists of two or three names and call herself by that. It is not permissible for her to take her husband’s name.
And Allaah knows best.
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